Pigmy Pig, how big you are, big as Pigmy Seal.
Pigmy Corn, how big you are, big as Pigmy Eal.
Pigmy Elk, how big you are, big as Pigmy Bear.
Pigmy Yam, how big you are, big as Pigmy Hare.
Pigmy Ox, how big you are, big as Pigmy Moose.
Pigmy Leek, how big you are, big as Pigmy Goose.
Pigmy Squash, how big you are, big as Pigmy Coon.
Pigmy Clam, how big you are, big as Pigmy Prune.
Pigmy Trout, how big you are, big as Pigmy Quail.
Pigmy Nut, how big you are, big as Pigmy Snail.
Pigmy Squirl, how big you are, big as Pigmy Beet.
Pigmy Grape, how big you are, big as Pigmy Wheet.
All you Herbivorians, reapers to adore,
if the only food were meat, you would eat no more.
All you Carnivorians, butchers to adore,
if the only food were plant, you would eat no more.
All you Omnivorians, waging total war,
if the only food were none, you would eat no more.
All the Pigmy Edibles wish you Pigmies well:
"Eat your way to Heaven, or eat your way to Hell!"
HIGH ON A ROCKY LEDGE
High on a rocky ledge lives a Mädel, Edelweiß.
She has a shadow, lovely as lace, and cold as ice.
High on a rocky ledge, I pledged my love to her.
Ev´ry time I climb up to Paradise.
How many times I´ve been up to see her, goodness knows,
Huffing and puffing, dressed in the warmest climbing clothes.
How many dances would be taken in my
Hopeless pursuit of the Schnee-Mädel-Edelweiß.
Then spoke a spirit, "If you would win your Lady Love,
There´s only one way: fall to your death from high above.
You will begin to grow in snow beside the one
You have waited for to be mated with."
Now, I´m an Edel, vice to my Mädel, Edelweiß.
Dying to be with her wasn´t any sacrifice.
we´re so deliriously happy on your ledge
Where I pledge my love to my Lady Fair.
You who are climbing breathless to see me and my love.
Snow flowers growing fonder on Lover´s Ledge above.
If you´ve the yen to pluck, then pluck us both,
For we who have lived as one, wish to die as one.
CHOO - CHOO LULLABY
Choo - Choo Lullaby, sing oh me oh my;
Rock a baby high, Choo - Choo.
Rock a baby low, rock a baby slow,
To Promotory Point wo go!
Choo-Choo have you heard? Mind you, not a word.
Their´s to be o back-tracking,
Back to coal and steam! Isn´t that a scream?
I heard it from a miner bird.
Carter wants her back, back to Hackensack,
Carter, out in Wyoming.
Carter wants her back, back to blow her stack,
So Choo-Choo, see what you can do,
Give her back her track, give her back her stack,
Taller than a tale, Choo-Choo.
Give her back her crew, give her back her due,
Along the Californya trail !
Give a boot a sail; give a kite a tail;
Give drought a rain, Choo-Choo.
Give your dear Ol´Dad what he never had,
An Honest Engine Choo-Choo Train.
What a "Union Day" is the Tenth of may,
Just For you and me, Choo-Choo.
Past and Future meet, underneath our feet,
A Promotory Point of view!
I´M JUST A HOP HEAD
I´m just a hop-head, and so I´ll be, till I´m dead.
I started hopping when first I hopped into bed.
I took up hop scotch, which had me hopping all day;
But that was kid stuff, and soon I put it away,
I took up fishing, and when the river was low,
I took to hopping from stone to stone, fish or no.
As I grow older, I took up sailing at sea;
Went island-hopping, a navigational spree.
I´m now a space-man; my flying saucer is fast.
Though slow in coming, I´m planet-hopping, at last.
I´ve reached my limit; no wider worlds to be won.
I´m so unhappy, I wish I´d never begun.
HERE´S TO J. W. H.
Here´s to John Wesley Hardin.
No man was quicker on the draw.
Many men tried his metal,
And found it wasn´t wanting lead.
Think of Jane when you judge him.
She loved and lost a wanted man.
Gaming tables were turning,
Against the man who learned the law.
Wes the Winner was losing,
To fall with bullets in his back.
Bottoms up to a Texan,
What´s more, a relative of mine.
I´M IN THE WORLD
I´m in the world
- where young and old
are bought and sold,
but I´m not of it.
..., where Peace and War
are bargained for,...
...- where Money talks
to Doves and Hawks,...
... - where Kith and Kin
are Moving in, ...
... - where Thought - Controll
is taking toll, ...
... - where Jokers Make -
Believe the Fake, ...
... - where Lies are Flies
that fill the Skies
... - where Boom and Bust
are both a must, ...
... - where Law is Force
a Trojan Horse, ...
... - where Good and Bad
are iron-clad, ...
... - where Pride in Race
is losing Face, ...
... - where Talk is cheap,
and Isms creep, ...
... - where Truth is what,
if not a Plot, ...
... - where Death is worth
as much as Birth, ...
DO YOUR THING!
Do your thing!
Be fancy-free to call the tune you sing.
Don´t give up!
That´s not the way to win a loving-cup.
Do your best,
and Opportunity will do the rest.
Don´t give in!
Capitulation is the greatest sin.
Do what´s right,
what´s right for you, to do with all your might.
What might have been, you might as well forget.
Stand your ground,
and while you´re standing there, be duty-bound.
Learn to wait,
and while you´re waiting, learn to concentrate.
All enemies I call potential friends,
Calm your fears,
and hope you cope at least a hundred years.
Make your mark!
If need be, even make it in the dark.
Mum´s the word!
My sage advice, pretend you haven´t heard.
ENOUGH ABOUT HUMAN RIGHTS
Enough about Human Rights
What about Wal Rights? What about Snail Rights?
What about Seal Rights? What about Eel Rights?
What about Coon Rights? What about Loon Rights?
What about Wolf Rights? What about, what about, what about,
What about Moose Rights? What about Goose Rights?
What about Lark Rights? What about Shark Rights?
What about Fox Rights? What about Ox Rights?
What about Mole Right? What about, what about, what about,
What about Goat Rights? What about Stoat Rights?
What about Pike Rigths? What about Shrike Rights?
What about Hare Rights? What about Bear Rights?
What about Ape Rights?
Enough about Human Rights!
What about Hog Rights? What about Frog Rights?
What about Kite Rights? What about Mite Rights?
What about Bee Rights? What about Flea Rights?
What about Ant Rights? What about, what about, what about,
What about Bat Rights? What about Gnat Rights?
What about Mouse Rights? What about Louse Right?
What about Cat Rights? What about Rat Rights?
What about Snake Rights? What about, what about, what about,
What about Bug Rights? What about Slug Rights?
What about Bass Rights? What about Ass Rights?
What about Worm Rights? What about Germ Rights?
What about Plant Rights?
|I´M THIS, I´M THAT
I´m this, I´m that;
I´m sharp, I´m flat;
I´m young, I´m old;
I´m hot, I´m cold;
I´m right, I´m wrong;
I´m weak, I´m strong;
I´m high, I´m low;
I´m fast, I´m slow;
I´m here, I´m there;
I´m foul, I´m fair;
I´m bold, I´m shy;
I´m wet, I´m dry;
I´m good, I´m bad;
I´m gay, I´m sad;
I´m lost, I´m found;
I´m free, I´m bound;
I´m best, I´m worst;
I´m blessed, I´m cursed;
I´m false, I´m true;
I´m I, I´m you!
Aska me about Alaska, if you care a tinker´s damn,
What I have to say about the Russian Bear and Uncle Sam,
Vitus Bering rediscovered Streights that somehow Bear his name,
After they had been discovered many times before he came.
Alexander Baranov, Administra(i)tor to the Czar,
Sat in Sitka with his books and paintings, eating caviar.
Then, in 1867, Seward bought it for a song;
Sing a song of seven million, and a fifth of something Strong.
Playing for itself in gold, some twenty times the price he payed,
"Seward´s Folly" was, by golly, where a killing could be made.
1912, a territory, 1952, a state.
All the Tlingits were so sorry, Uncle Sam had come so late.
When the exploitation´s over and the last exploiter´s gone,
Then whatever left of life and limb can try to carry on.